The Guide to Procrastinating: To Work or Not to Work

There’s a lot of work that goes into not working.

Procrastinating, or the art of waiting until the last minute to complete work, is a strenuous activity enjoyed by some workaholics who just can’t seem to keep track of time. It involves extensive preparation and execution time, and only professional procrastinators understand the work that goes into it.

There is an art that goes into procrastinating, and only the most time-crunching individuals can consider themselves professional procrastinators.

Taking myself for example, I have exceeded the expectations of normal procrastinators. When I was in high school taking an Advanced Placement English Language and Composition class, I would hold off on writing my essays for the entire duration of the assignment. I would go to sleep the night before it was due still having not started, and I would proceed to wake up around 1:45 a.m. to begin my paper to turn in at 7 a.m. Though I waited so long to finish, I promise I wisely planned my schedule to fill the time with procrastinating activities.

Trying to plan a procrastinator’s schedule consists of hours of planning how to spend his or her time while helping him or her to figure out the best deadline-pushing time to begin the task. Other procrastinators are the best friends for this type of person, because it gives the professional procrastinator someone to work with.

Being a professional procrastinator myself, I take time out of each day to organize how I am going to procrastinate certain assignments. Whether filling my time with hobbies, friends, or trips to the store, there are infinitely many ways to make time to procrastinate.

Not only does procrastinating take time, but it also uses great amounts of energy. Three hour naps, driving to and from the store, talking for endless hours with friends and eating any and everything around the house is quite the workout. When I started procrastinating, I had no idea how much energy it took, but low and behold I expend more energy procrastinating than doing most daily activities.

Now, to be a professional procrastinator like myself, carefulness is a virtue in terms of actually completing tasks. The key to being a successful procrastinator is still completing assignments even with nearly none of the time to actually do it. Even though time runs short while procrastinating, the task still has to be done. My favorite saying for completing tasks after procrastinating is “diamonds are made under pressure” because some of my best works have come from the art of waiting.

On a similar but different note, sometimes people tell me that procrastinating is bad. Excuse me? It’s the best habit in the world so who could say it’s a bad thing?

The ones who tell me these things like my parents say that procrastinating is a bad study habit because it can “deter my sleeping patterns” and actually cause me to lose memory for the material. I guess it’s true to an extent, but I forget what else they said about it being bad.

Procrastinating is much more effective than actually doing tasks in advance. Like I said before, “diamonds are made under pressure.”

It can’t be that bad, can it? I mean, procrastinators spend countless minutes and hours preparing how to spend time, how else would that time be spent?

Doing the work ahead of time? What nonsense. Very few people actually use their task timeframe to study or re-write notes or proofread papers or even write papers.

I guess I can see how it might work, but I’m not sure that I could achieve the life of a non-procrastinator. Getting things finished way before deadlines, making time to re-read and take notes on textbooks, and correcting all the “problems” that procrastination causes seems like a pretty challenging change. Maybe I should try it; I’ll give an update on how some time as a non-procrastinator goes, but I’ll start next week. Wish me luck!

**Disclaimer: Procrastinating should not be used as an effective study skill. Complete work on time; it’s not worth the loss of sleep or extra stress.**